The woman behind Mother of the Spiritual Child

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Turns out staring at a blank sheet of paper, with a pen that doesn’t work, insisting on not using technology to avoid the procrastination of social media scrolling, so that I can find the words to say HI! is really hard.  

The irony of picking up pen and paper to write a post to be shared online is not lost on me!

So with a cuppa in my hand, I’m instead imagining you are here sitting with me and I’ll begin how I always begin, with a smile.

I’m Marie and it’s really lovely to meet you.  Would love to hear what brings you here to say hello, so please do pop along to Instagram and say hi!

I guess the first thing is to tell you a little bit about the woman behind Mother of the Spiritual Child.

In short, I’m mum of two beautifully inspiring boys and wife to a very patient husband!

I love being either on the beach or in the woods and am barefoot on the earth as often as possible, taking full advantage of our wonderful location in West Sussex, between the sea and the South Downs.

My bookshelf is full, I’m surrounded by crystals, and have energy work at the heart of everything I do.   With a grounding of 20 years experience as a project manager, I learnt that it’s supporting the people behind the work and the deadlines where my passion lies.

The full story is a little longer, so if you’d like a second pour of tea, I’ll tell you a little more.

The full story is a little longer, so if you’d like a second pour of tea, I’ll tell you a little more.

It all began with the birthing of the Mother and the Child.

I mean, I existed before then of course, and the experiences are fundamental in everything that came next, but I existed in a job, in a corporate world, getting by conforming in every way I could.

I’d long since overlooked the intuition of childhood, ignored the connection with my body and let my head, not my heart rule.

My pregnancy followed a number of devastating miscarriages, which instead of bringing me closer to listening to my body caused even more of a disconnect.

I threw myself headlong into my work, to the point when a colleague questioned in a meeting if I was sure I wasn’t in labour, I laughed it off, said I wasn’t due for over a month, (hey I’d not even finished the hypnobirthing course I was on so baby couldn’t possibly be arriving yet), and I just carried on.

Two days and a long labour later, our little man was born a month early.

Overnight, everything changed.  I was no longer in control.

I felt lost.  I no longer felt like me.  I even remember noticing I smelt different and it didn’t recognise myself in any way.

Having spent most of my adult life in a career where I could pretty much solve any problem that was presented to me, I found myself in a situation that I was clueless about.  My determination to ‘do things right’ resulted in me refusing most help offered, because I had to do things myself to prove I was ‘in control’ 

I wasn’t….. And as it turned out, I didn’t need to be!

I soon learnt that the reason I was feeling so unsettled was I was going against everything that felt like my instinct to do.  I’d got so used to conforming, doing as expected and being in control of things, that I’d just started following suit.  Then a piece of advice came my way, that was so against everything I believed, felt and knew was right for me and my little man, that the penny dropped.  I knew instinctively how to do this, I just needed to tune back into that trust.

It was only at this point that I really stopped to get to know myself.

I say stopped, obviously I don’t mean stopped.  Who gets to actually stop on this crazy ride right?!

What actually happened was we had created a tiny little determined version of me!  A mirror to everything I both loved and questioned about myself.  But all I saw was everything I considered to be my failings.  

Me and little man clashed and the outbursts were big!  It took some time to realise that it was myself I was clashing with and he was the one shining the light.

I experienced a number of losses again before falling pregnant with littlest man.  My physical and mental health were suffering.  

I’d thought I was totally prepared the second time, but the celebrations and challenges that he brought were totally different and I’d not been prepared for that.  I’d not been prepared for learning all over again.

By the time littlest man was 18 months old I broke and slowly ground to an earth shattering halt.

Rebuilding myself from there has been a journey of discovery, learning and remembering.  Most importantly it’s been the realisation that I have two very different and very wonderful little teachers in my life who have opened my eyes and helped me remember who I really am!

The first step began with my discovery of Qoya, learning to move and connect with my body.  

Through my Qoya journey I learnt about the power that comes together when we gather in circle.  I experienced what it meant to be welcomed into sacred space and through this understanding I began to follow my intuition, leading me to lay my first crystal grid, receive the first of my Reiki attunements and begin my journey with energy healing.

All this is now central to how I live, how I parent and how I work. 

This is a journey I am so grateful that I get to share with you now.